I dont know if its hormones or drugs, but every now and then I get really weirdly sensitive about my relationship and it makes me have doubts. I dont know if its womens actually some kind of womens intuition or if im being neurotic, but sometimes I feel like my love cant have fun with me. It scares me that we dont have enough in common in our relationship sometimes to click. Like I know he has fun with me when were with a group of friends, and there are other people with us, but I feel like we dont know how to be our own couple. Since weve been dating weve lived with other people. We've both always had other friends around to entertain us when the other was doing their thing. With my love its generally that Ive always had a friend that hangs out with me around when he was playing video games.
(I feel like this thing is where I come to ramble about my insecurities)
So flash forward to my concerns. We are planning a trip for our 4 year anniversary, and its just going to be the two of us. Granted we live together, but it feels like its so different to be a going a trip just the two of us. Spending a whole weekend alone without computers and cell phones and video games. Im afraid hes going to find me boring, and not have a good time just spending quality time with me. I dont know what Id do if that happened. Sometimes I feel like I love him too much. More than he can handle, and thats scary. I do have to say this is the first time that he and I are taking a romantic weekend away just the two of us ever in our 4 years together. Every trip weve taken has either been up to a cottage with his parents, or on a trip with his family, or on a trip to stay with my parents out of state. We've been up north with friends, camping with friends, and day tripped with friends.
Am I being unreasonable? I just want to know if other people feel this way? Am I just being a paranoid girl? or should I be concerned. Theres a huge part of me that feels like other couples have to feel this way.
I just think that in our society and world if youre in a committed relationship you dont get to spend a lot of time together. With school, work, hobbies, and technology we dont get a lot of time together and when you do get personal couple time, its used poorly.
**sigh
Monday, March 11, 2013
Saturday, March 9, 2013
being a magic widow
So a little about me, 4 years ago about this time I met the love of my life. We were and are polar opposite people, but absolutely he is my soul mate. We didnt know each other at all the night before we met, we had a ton of mutual friends, and our paths should have crossed years before that but they never did. The night I met him I was instantly attracted to him, and we started talking, and after the first night we hung out we were pretty much inseparable.
When I say we are polar different people its because our backgrounds are so different. My love's family is pretty well off, college-educated, seemingly straight laced. He grew up in a nice area, and his dad works for a prominent computer company and he was exposed to a lot more technology than I ever was. They always had computers and video games and that kind of stuff in their house, and I didnt really. My family was pretty lower middle class, I grew up in Flint, Michigan, didnt have video game consoles, didnt even know PC gaming was a thing..keep in mind im 25 years old. I played sports and my dad was super into athletics, he played soccer, baseball, and hockey until i was almost in junior high. My parents are super irresponsible, late generation hippies. Just polar opposite of his family.
Instead of this being a bad thing, its been the best part of our relationships, we have exposed eachother to so much new stuff. I love learning the stuff he knows, and I love taking him to do stuff he never really did, like go to Red Wings games and camping and stuff. It has helped us to develop our relationship and make it stronger through learning together, as well as given us the opportunity to grow as a couple and have our own individual lives outside of our relationship. The biggest hobby my love has is playing a card game.
I didnt know it at the time but my love plays a game that Im sure only half of you have ever heard of called Magic: The Gathering. He is really amazing at it, and travels all over the U.S. to play in huge money winning tournaments. He gets better all the time, and so he plays more often than he used to when we first got together. Lately he has been going out of state at least once a month, sometimes twice a month to play. I am so proud of him for going after something he loves, and working hard, but its hard for me sometimes to stay home by myself.
I am not proud to say it, but I am awfully co-dependent. I love just being near him, even after 4 years, I am the most content just being in the same room with him, even if it means watching him look at MtG stuff on the computer, or playing video games. He's my nerd, the love of my life, and one of the smartest and funniest people Ive ever known.
It does suck sitting at home by myself a night or two a week or every once in a while on a weekend, but its worth it to watch him do something he loves, and hes damn good at. I am so proud of him, even if that means constantly having to explain why hes out of town and not able to make it to an event.
When I say we are polar different people its because our backgrounds are so different. My love's family is pretty well off, college-educated, seemingly straight laced. He grew up in a nice area, and his dad works for a prominent computer company and he was exposed to a lot more technology than I ever was. They always had computers and video games and that kind of stuff in their house, and I didnt really. My family was pretty lower middle class, I grew up in Flint, Michigan, didnt have video game consoles, didnt even know PC gaming was a thing..keep in mind im 25 years old. I played sports and my dad was super into athletics, he played soccer, baseball, and hockey until i was almost in junior high. My parents are super irresponsible, late generation hippies. Just polar opposite of his family.
Instead of this being a bad thing, its been the best part of our relationships, we have exposed eachother to so much new stuff. I love learning the stuff he knows, and I love taking him to do stuff he never really did, like go to Red Wings games and camping and stuff. It has helped us to develop our relationship and make it stronger through learning together, as well as given us the opportunity to grow as a couple and have our own individual lives outside of our relationship. The biggest hobby my love has is playing a card game.
I didnt know it at the time but my love plays a game that Im sure only half of you have ever heard of called Magic: The Gathering. He is really amazing at it, and travels all over the U.S. to play in huge money winning tournaments. He gets better all the time, and so he plays more often than he used to when we first got together. Lately he has been going out of state at least once a month, sometimes twice a month to play. I am so proud of him for going after something he loves, and working hard, but its hard for me sometimes to stay home by myself.
I am not proud to say it, but I am awfully co-dependent. I love just being near him, even after 4 years, I am the most content just being in the same room with him, even if it means watching him look at MtG stuff on the computer, or playing video games. He's my nerd, the love of my life, and one of the smartest and funniest people Ive ever known.
It does suck sitting at home by myself a night or two a week or every once in a while on a weekend, but its worth it to watch him do something he loves, and hes damn good at. I am so proud of him, even if that means constantly having to explain why hes out of town and not able to make it to an event.
Thursday, March 7, 2013
Blogging is weird,
I used to use live journal all the time when I was in high school. I feel like my life is so much less interesting now. Maybe its because i'm old and i'm actually boring, or maybe I just feel like Im old and boring.
Anyway, Im rambling. I guess this is for my thoughts. It doesnt make a difference, blogging doesnt seem like a thing people really do anymore so I dont imagine many people reading it anyway. Ramble on.
Basically all I do is giveaways on the computer these days, its probably because I don't leave the house anymore except to go to the gym or to work, so I might as well make the fact that I spend the rest of the time on my couch trying to win shit.
http://giveawaytools.com/share.php?giveaway=78210811
I think I just set at home day dreaming about getting married and having babies, and thats why I keep doing these baby give aways ever since I found them on Bree's blog. At first I thought it was crazy, to enter giveaways before youre even pregnant, or in my case planning on trying to get pregnant, but now I kind of think its genius. The thought of having everything I need for a baby, especially expensive things like carriers and cloth diapers that I know im going to need an excessive amount of for completely free, it seems worth it for people to think youre crazy.
The urge to enter these contests is probably also linked to my obsession with getting deals and couponing, which is probably why they tend to go hand in hand. I love it whatever, im not here to defend myself. Its badass and even if I dont get to have a baby right now, so many of my friends are having them its even worth it to spoil them with things that are eco-friendly and expensive!
I used to use live journal all the time when I was in high school. I feel like my life is so much less interesting now. Maybe its because i'm old and i'm actually boring, or maybe I just feel like Im old and boring.
Anyway, Im rambling. I guess this is for my thoughts. It doesnt make a difference, blogging doesnt seem like a thing people really do anymore so I dont imagine many people reading it anyway. Ramble on.
Basically all I do is giveaways on the computer these days, its probably because I don't leave the house anymore except to go to the gym or to work, so I might as well make the fact that I spend the rest of the time on my couch trying to win shit.
http://giveawaytools.com/share.php?giveaway=78210811
I think I just set at home day dreaming about getting married and having babies, and thats why I keep doing these baby give aways ever since I found them on Bree's blog. At first I thought it was crazy, to enter giveaways before youre even pregnant, or in my case planning on trying to get pregnant, but now I kind of think its genius. The thought of having everything I need for a baby, especially expensive things like carriers and cloth diapers that I know im going to need an excessive amount of for completely free, it seems worth it for people to think youre crazy.
The urge to enter these contests is probably also linked to my obsession with getting deals and couponing, which is probably why they tend to go hand in hand. I love it whatever, im not here to defend myself. Its badass and even if I dont get to have a baby right now, so many of my friends are having them its even worth it to spoil them with things that are eco-friendly and expensive!
Monday, March 4, 2013
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